Marriage And Divorces in India
It is said that marriages are arranged in Heaven and they are solemnized on earth. For a Hindu marriage is a Samskara(religious rite or sacrament). Marriage is a tie that can never be broken and it is relation established from birth to birth according to ancient Hindu Law. Many are in beliefs that even death cannot break the relation between wife and husband with is sacred and religious.
Then How Divorce comes in between the two lives.
Divorce means terminating the relation between Husband and Wife. After terminating the tie of marriage they can become friends, foe or relative or without any relation.
Divorce In India
There was a time when less than 1% of marriage turned out to be divorce.
When you can Give Divorce Legally?
As per the Hindu Marriage Act, only on the following occasions either spouse can ask for Divorce in India.
- Desertion for a period of a minimum of two years
- Ceased to be Hindu
- Incurable unsound mind or intermittently from a mental disorder
- Suffering from leprosy
- Suffering from venereal disease in a communicable form
- Has renounced the world by entering any religious order
- Not knowing whereabouts for a period of seven years or more
- Divorce by mutual consent
Reasons for Divorces in India
I do feel the following reasons are main for getting maximum divorces.
1. Maximum Use of Social Media: Using social media hours after hours is one of the reasons for increasing divorces in India. What we see in media especially in TV and net series that each hero or heroine has multiple affairs. They are morally corrupt.
Hardly we promote any good social behavior. Lust, Money, and power is the main theme of these serials. When we see that adultery is accepted in social life then everyone wants to taste the forbidden apple.
The use of FaceBook, WhatsApp, Instagram, and dating sites increases your lust which turns to multiple affairs. When these multiple affairs are not accepted by either spouse it led to divorce. Earlier there was a social taboo of divorce now it is easily accepted by society.
2.Education and Financial Independence of women: Earlier it was the duty of women to keep the marriage intact. But women are now more educated and have got financial freedom. Freedom means they are free from any binding let it be family, social or anything else. Freedom is absolutely fine for women but the problem is that they are challenging every authority to prove their freedom. Their mentality has completely changed towards life and family.
3. Lack of Adjustment within the family. The conflict between Mother-in-law and daughter-in-law is the main cause of an unhappy marriage. This conflict gives three results. First One is divorce, wherever possible by either side. The second one is prolonged unhappy marriage and adultery, the Third one is suicidal death or killing.
4. Unhealthy Lifestyle and job pressure: Job pressure is also one of the reasons for increasing divorce. Nowadays, there is tremendous pressure to perform in the workplace. As job security is becoming things of the past, each employee wants to secure his job which results in less time towards the family.
Where ever husband and wife, both are working, they are not able to manage time for their family and spouse. Each one feels that he/she is being neglected by another spouse. This problem gets bigger when children start going to school and seek a parent’s presence then the question comes who will sacrifice for the sake of children. This eventually leads to divorce.
5. Criticism and Contempt: It happens in the family that the husband always criticizes his wife in front of her family, friends, and relatives. It may give momentary pleasure to a husband but makes a deep mark in the mind of a wife. When the opportunity comes wife may resort to divorce. It is not always the husband, many times the wife also criticize her husband.
Example: 1. “You can not do any work properly.” 2. “You look so ugly that I do not like to outside with you.” 3. ” I feel shame to discuss your earning” or “You earn so less that we can not afford minimum luxury”.
6. Sex: People have physical and emotional needs. When the sexual desires of either spouse become too much and not full filled by a spouse then he/she tries to find satisfaction outside marriage. This may not be accepted and leads to divorce.
7. Unrealistic Expectation: Unrealistic expectation from spouse which is not fulfilled leads to divorce.
8. Alcohol or drug addiction. When husband completely dependent on alcohol or drug he fails to perform his duty to his wife which leads to divorce.
9. Falling in love with someone: When either spouse falls in love outside the marriage it results in divorce.
10. Adjustment Problem: Each one of us raised differently. Sometimes our differences are so much that we can not adjust each other. It happens when after marriage wife moves to husband’s house it becomes
How We Can Stop Divorces
Divorce is a failed marriage. Failing in anything is not good until you learn and rectify your mistakes. Divorce is a better option when you can not go along with your spouse. But leaving a relationship is not that easy. It has an emotional effect, financial effect, and social effect.
So where ever possible it is better to continue a relationship. Give your relationship one more chance.
Let us discuss how to give a chance to your relationship.
1. Be Considerate: Each issue has three sides. First. what is right? Second is what you feel and third and most important is what your spouse thinks? Think about each issue from the perspective of your spouse. What is right for you may not be right for your spouse. Think of him/her and analyze each action.
2. Accept: Accept your spouse as it is. Never every two persons can be the same. There must be a difference in culture, habits, look and in behavior. No one can be good at everything. Each one has some good things and some bad things in him/her. No one is perfect. It is a complete package. Realize it and accept it.
3. Appreciate; Appreciate your spouse whenever he/she does good things. For each little good thing appreciate your spouse. This will make your relationship better.
4. Leave it to God. God knows what is right for you. Just leave it for Him. God will make it good when times come.